This last fall my son wanted to see the movie The Hunger Games. I had already read the book and knew the content. I wanted him to wait. Gradually, the report came back. Weekly, he ticked off each friend that had been allowed to see the movie. I decided he could see the movie, with conditions. He would watch it with me or his
The indoor soccer bleachers are a great place for me to get my weekly fix of some very favorite parent friends. Today, my friend Kathryn told me about “Does It Matter?” – something her son learned from his 6th grade teacher. She gave an example of how her son, during a game of kick-ball, got hit in the back with the ball after he
I have often caught myself using wants and needs with my son. “Zed, I need you to take out the trash,” or “I want you to stop playing that video game.” These statements seem pretty harmless. They will often jump start Zed into doing what I ask. However, by using want or need, it sounds like I want or need something personal for myself.
Help! My child won’t listen. My child refuses to do what I ask. I have to say things over and over and still she refuses. Many parents are in the habit of repetition when they ask their child to make a behavior change. Hence, the children may perceive that their parents are “demanding” or “nag all the time.” What to do when even the
I’m not talking about counting to five, or counting on fingers, or counting cars on a road trip. I’m talking about the disciplinary action of counting down to get a child to behave. Many of my friends really embrace the idea of non-punitive parenting, or parenting with a positive discipline style. Yet, I have seen a similar scenario to the one below many times
R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Aretha knew what she was singing about. She wasn’t asking for love. She wanted respect. I love my kid to pieces. But when Zed is not listening to my voice and chasing the dog with a paint brush in his hand and the model-airplane paint (permanent, of course) is now on my newly-redecorated kitchen cabinets, I will admit to not feeling so loving. Fortunately,
I was asked about time-outs today by a mom in my music class. Then I came home to this post on The Stir called “Time-Outs for Toddlers: Are You Doing It Wrong?” So, it’s a perfect topic for today. The best part about the time-out concept is that it Stops The Child’s World. It works as a pattern interrupt, can calm emotions, and helps
My son – all 6 lbs of him at birth – didn’t look like he’d ever have a tantrum. And we were pretty lucky. They were few. But those were enough to send me scrambling for ways to get back in my groove. What can cause a tantrum? Not Being Understood Not Getting What they Want Tired, Hungry, Uncomfortable Not really knowing Who is
Not to be feared, those three special words: “I am Bored!” I love it when Zed says this. I know that just around the corner is something amazing – a new Lego creation, an invention, a game out of sticks and pine cones, or . . . ? So when I hear this childhood rant that paralyzes some parents, a little thrill runs through
“Time’s up. Turn off your iPad,” I yell from the kitchen to another part of the house. “What, Mom?” my son yells back. “No more Minecraft!” I yell a little louder. “WHAT?” I am agitated now. He must be ignoring me. At full-throttle volume: “TURN IT OFF!” Has this ever happened to you? Daily, maybe? One of the biggest changes we made as a
