I have often caught myself using wants and needs with my son. “Zed, I need you to take out the trash,” or “I want you to stop playing that video game.” These statements seem pretty harmless. They will often jump start Zed into doing what I ask. However, by using want or need, it sounds like I want or need something personal for myself.
Help! My child won’t listen. My child refuses to do what I ask. I have to say things over and over and still she refuses. Many parents are in the habit of repetition when they ask their child to make a behavior change. Hence, the children may perceive that their parents are “demanding” or “nag all the time.” What to do when even the
I’m not talking about counting to five, or counting on fingers, or counting cars on a road trip. I’m talking about the disciplinary action of counting down to get a child to behave. Many of my friends really embrace the idea of non-punitive parenting, or parenting with a positive discipline style. Yet, I have seen a similar scenario to the one below many times
R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Aretha knew what she was singing about. She wasn’t asking for love. She wanted respect. I love my kid to pieces. But when Zed is not listening to my voice and chasing the dog with a paint brush in his hand and the model-airplane paint (permanent, of course) is now on my newly-redecorated kitchen cabinets, I will admit to not feeling so loving. Fortunately,
I was asked about time-outs today by a mom in my music class. Then I came home to this post on The Stir called “Time-Outs for Toddlers: Are You Doing It Wrong?” So, it’s a perfect topic for today. The best part about the time-out concept is that it Stops The Child’s World. It works as a pattern interrupt, can calm emotions, and helps
My son – all 6 lbs of him at birth – didn’t look like he’d ever have a tantrum. And we were pretty lucky. They were few. But those were enough to send me scrambling for ways to get back in my groove. What can cause a tantrum? Not Being Understood Not Getting What they Want Tired, Hungry, Uncomfortable Not really knowing Who is
Singalong Storybooks are the brainchild of Music Together, the international, research-based, early childhood music program. What a GREAT idea! They have taken several songs from their music collection and created a storybook around a song. In this video, Susan Darrow, Director of Educational Services for Music Together, clearly explains a variety of ways to interact with your child musically at home using these Singalong
In a recent post, “Close the Distance,” I talk about the importance of literally closing the distance when communicating with one another. Beth Gillogly is a parent as well as Director of Sierra Foothills Music Together, an early childhood music program. She wrote the following comment: “I find that when I stop and connect with my daughter, eye to eye, the results are much
Not to be feared, those three special words: “I am Bored!” I love it when Zed says this. I know that just around the corner is something amazing – a new Lego creation, an invention, a game out of sticks and pine cones, or . . . ? So when I hear this childhood rant that paralyzes some parents, a little thrill runs through
“Time’s up. Turn off your iPad,” I yell from the kitchen to another part of the house. “What, Mom?” my son yells back. “No more Minecraft!” I yell a little louder. “WHAT?” I am agitated now. He must be ignoring me. At full-throttle volume: “TURN IT OFF!” Has this ever happened to you? Daily, maybe? One of the biggest changes we made as a
